I came into this world with a love of light and color. From the time I knew what to call it, I wanted to be an artist. Developing this gift has opened many a door, all of which have eventually led to the same place—to my coming to know my true self and my relationship to the Divine. As I worked on the cover of the book "Healing Feelings . . . From Your Heart," I realized that every phase of it was a reflection of myself. It evolved through more than one title, three paintings and several designs. Every step has been essential, leading to the cover as you see it now. So it has been with my life. Whenever I think I have things all tidied up into a perfect picture, unexpected colors somehow get thrown in, changing its appearance and forcing me to take another look—to see it afresh. I have painted many covers for the book of my life, and I am sure I will paint many more.

We all have a book of life that contains a complete and faithful record of our thoughts, feelings, and actions. We have been creating it since the day we were born. We are not only the author, writing the story—we are the artist, painting the cover. How it looks is up to us. If we look in the mirror at our cover, we will see either a reflection of our true Self, or a mask created to suit the expectations of the world, created for the acceptance of others. If we don't like what we see, only we can do something about it. I'm continually brought before the mirror to face another mask. It has always been my desire to be all I could be and to make a difference in the world. The pathway leading to that has been filled with more than I could ever have imagined. Sometimes I think if we knew beforehand what we were about to go through, we would probably stop right where we were. But we don't know; so we keep on traveling. And as we do, we often find that when our desire for something is strong enough, the tools or teachers that we need arrive.

The first edition of Karol's book Feelings Buried Alive Never Die . . . and Karol arrived in my life at just such a moment. At that time I was struggling to cope with life, unaware of the many masks I had painted on my self portrait. I had no idea that the real "me" was in hiding. As I read Karol's book for the first time, it was like food after a long fast. I ate it in two days and it was delicious to my soul. The truths it contained resonated with my entire being. I had received some hard blows, as we all do at one time or another, and was looking for help. I had been doing what I thought I “should” to be the ideal wife, mother, and citizen, when I suddenly had the rug pulled out from under me, causing me to look at my life through new eyes—eyes with much improved lenses. Up to that time, I had played the role others "expected" of me. But I finally reached a point at which I knew deep inside that there was more to life than what I was experiencing. I realized that I had to find my own answers to the questions I had about life and that life must be lived honestly, and from my inner feelings. Karol's book provided many of the answers I had been looking for and more importantly, a pathway back to myself.

I began using the Script found in the book to deal with all of the intense feelings I was experiencing. To my amazement, the deep anger, hate, and guilt (to name only a few of the negative feelings) began diminishing immediately. Eventually, I attended one of Karol's seminars, and later consulted with her many times in person and on the phone. She assisted me in revising my self portrait until my heart finally reappeared on the canvas. Then one day, I realized that there was no more anger inside of me for the things that had caused such discomfort for so long. I also discovered that I had truly forgiven others for the things that had transpired. Most of all I had forgiven myself. What a joyous feeling—being rid of old negative feelings!

Time passed, during which we were not in contact with each other, and it was during this time that I had an experience that led to my becoming Karol's cover artist. One morning while in the simple act of making my bed, a vision opened before me. I saw myself as a person who was well known in the world, enjoying an abundance of all the good things in life. Upon seeing such a wonderful vision of myself, I asked aloud and with disbelief, "How could this ever happen to me?" Up to that time I had seen myself as someone from a little town, only known by a few people—an average person of small means, not unlike most of the people I had lived around all of my life.

As soon as I asked the question however, I received a surprising answer. The words, "You will paint the cover of Karol Truman's book" came down into me from above and to the right, and spread throughout my body. It may sound strange but that's exactly what happened. The words came audibly, with great feeling and power. I then said in surprise and disbelief, "I'll what?" And I heard and felt the words again, "You will paint the cover of Karol Truman's book." I was still so amazed and disbelieving that the words came again a third time. I finally quit resisting and began pondering what I had seen and heard. I wondered why she would ever ask me to do such a thing. After all, who was I that she would ever ask me? (You see—I had

no self-worth painted on the cover of my own book.) Also, we lived a great distance from each other and had not been in contact for quite a while. Besides, I reasoned with myself, she already had a cover for her book—was she going to write another book or what? I shared this experience with only a few people at the time. I then put it on the shelf and went on with my life.

A year later, a friend called informing me that she had scheduled Karol to teach a seminar in Montpelier, a neighboring town, and that Karol would have time to work with some people individually before the seminar. I immediately set up an appointment for myself—having no clue as to why. The appointment drew closer, and I began to ask myself what I was going to consult with Karol about. Eventually the idea came to me that I should have her help me through my artistic blocks. I was at a place where I knew I had more inside of me that needed expression, but I was unable to access that with my painting. I had become proficient at painting realistically what I saw, but not what I felt inside.

The time of my appointment with Karol arrived and while waiting for her to finish with another client, I found myself visiting with her husband, Delmont. In passing conversation, he mentioned that they were in the process of printing a revised edition of Feelings Buried Alive Never Die . . . and that they were going to have a new cover as well. Immediately I remembered what I had heard a year before. He then went on to tell me that someone had already created a new cover. Figuring that it was a completed project, I refrained from saying anything.

Meanwhile, the day before the session, the idea had come to me to take a few photographs of my paintings to the session, but I resolved to show them only if I was strongly impressed to do so. Because that impression came, I pulled them out during the session and shared them Karol. She later told me, that upon seeing them she had thought she may have found her cover artist, but she didn't say anything at the time.

The next morning, my husband Alan and I were waiting in the hall for the seminar to begin when Karol and Delmont arrived. Karol went on to ask me if I would be interested in looking at the new cover, to see what I thought of it. At that point Alan prodded me to tell them what I had experienced a year before. You can guess what happened after that. After the seminar, I looked at the cover and clearly saw in my mind's eye the painting that I was to do instead. Karol then asked me to paint it, which I did. The words I had heard, "You will paint the cover of Karol Truman's

I later learned that the Truman's had taken the previous cover idea to the printer and were told, for various reasons, that they needed something different. There was Karol, with a seminar to teach and only two weeks to come up with a new cover. Unbeknown to her, she would find her cover artist at the seminar. (Don't you love the way these things are always so perfectly orchestrated?)

As a result of that session with Karol, I began a journey with my painting that has awakened in me the ability to freely express visions, feelings and knowing beyond the physical. I have also been able to teach others how to do the same. The joy experienced while creating in this way and sharing it with others is exquisite! I have learned that creativity, or true joyful living, grows out of a desire to change. It involves a leap of faith—faith in the creative process and in the process of living life. Most importantly, it involves accepting that the process is the journey and that the journey is the destination. As we live the life of a creator, by maintaining the flexibility to flow with what happens in any given moment, joyful living is ours.

Perhaps the greatest barrier I had to becoming more creative with my art was the fear of risk, and the fear of what other's would think. As human beings, we like feeling safe and secure—we like maps. We also like being accepted by others. Creativity, on the other hand—or truly living life from our heart—demands that we step into the unknown and be true to ourselves. In truth, who you are as a person automatically provides a guide for your creative growth, a guide for life. Therefore, the more you come to know your true Self, the more you are able to focus your creativity in support of whatever it is you are doing or wish to do. The more you come to know your true Self, and live that truth, the more you will experience "joy" as your companion in life. Anything less than the pursuit of that which gives you the most joy is denial. I have already walked the path of denial, and found that no amount of money or anything else is worth selling your Self for. The time finally came for me to regain my authority and reclaim the power of knowing. For no one knows better than yourself what is proper and timely for your journey. Laying the masks to rest—I nurtured my dreams allowing them to become concrete realities. I learned that all the questions that filled my reality and their answers, were found in perfect harmony within. Every painting I now do is a joyful expression of my Love and I am grateful that this is so.

I have now painted two book covers for Karol, to say nothing of those we passed over, and always there has been the experience of growth in my association with her. Having worked closely with her for years on many projects and having seen her in all kinds of situations, I can say that knowing Karol is experiencing unconditional love in action. She lives the things she teaches in her books. Whenever she looks in the mirror and sees anything less than the truth of her BE-ing, she confronts herself and does whatever is necessary to paint her cover from truth.

As you use the "tools" Karol shares in her books may you more easily remove the masks and ably paint the portrait of your true Self—returning to the Sacred Heart, to the Love that you truly are! Dream your dreams and own them. Only through consciously BE_ing your own cover artist can you attain your true goals.